♒Åℚ∪Åℜ│⊔S ♒

In a relationship, I condone silence being the solution, at least not a permanent one. Why do you choose to sweep everything under the carpet when you clearly know there's only so much that the carpet can contain? What good does keeping mum just to avoid an argument brings? Unhappiness, anger, soreness are all pent up, let alone not solving the core of the problem. Is this how a healthy relationship blossoms? I don't think so. And I know you are on the same page as me.

The immense feelings I have are insignificant compared to yours, because I'm not the victim of those sufferings. Hearing that shivering voice, seeing those droplets of tears, I feel my insides caving in. I know you aren't beaming with happiness for sure, but hearing how unhappy you are, it makes me rage. 

A victim needs to voice out. No more prolonging, because all it does is prolonging your suffering and soon enough, there will be another innocent and young party suffering. If not for yourself, then for him. 

Guilty of dwelling on melancholy as much as dwelling on happiness. I guess that's included in the package of a typical sentimental ♀with thoughts creeping up at her every now and then. Not hinting that guys don't care as much, perhaps it's just the part where girls usually are the ones who are more affected and we show it, either expressly or implicitly. 

We think, but we don't over-think. We analyze/emphasize, not over-think. Sure, it may appear like a pea-sized issue to you guys, but to us, it isn't just a small issue that we can shrug it off our shoulders. It doesn't consume (don't let it) us, but it does affect us and our feelings. The most perfect and simple example which most of us girls can relate to will probably be appearance issue. 

Us: "I feel so ugly." "Ya, cause I'm not as good looking as her.", etc

Them: "You are just over-thinking."

We, over-thinking? No, there's some factor that did spark off this line of thought. Over-thinking is brooding over some thing that is non-existent. Some thing sparked off this thought of ours. It may be you commenting on how gorgeous other girls look or us seeing nasty comments on how a girl looks on social media when she's just a plain Jane, like us. Whatever reason it is, some thing sets us off thinking negatively about our own appearance. So no, we aren't over-thinking, there is a reason or reasons why our thoughts even wondered off in that particular direction. 

We're good analysts, not some girl on pms mode. Understand that girls, like guys, do have their gloomy days so don't go attributing it on our pms or 'over-thinking shit' when such days come. You don't hear us attributing your huge ego & pride or insensitivity to the sperms produced by your male sex organ, do you? 

You know that's indeed the happiest moment when you feel that happiest is an understatement. Exactly my sentiment on Sunday when I made a memorable trip to my grandma's old house with my siz, Heroine & Janice. Then I was the happiest me, with no worries, no burdens, no complexities. 

A memorable trip to the place filled with my childhood memories. Every single lane that leads to every single familar path. With every step I took, images of my childhood came flooding my mind like a TV show on repeat, except mine wasn't appearing visually, it was mental recollections. Mental recollections, that's all I have left of the past. 

The lady boss of my favorite mama shop, the uncle who delivers gas to households, the granny who is still selling roasted meat & the next door indian neighbour. All these faces, they remained. It's like nothing has changed yet everything isn't the same anymore. 

What seizes my heart was the fact that they still remember us just like we do. I'm searching frantically for words to describe the emotions swirling within me at that moment when they expressed their recollections of us, of my grandma. They still remember my grandma who is unable to do the same due to her senile condition. 

Love takes many forms. 

The perfection of a duo too. 

Yours differ from mine, mine from yours. So who are we to say who's right? 

I've seen many different ways of loving someone & being loved, mostly from dramas. But I'd like to think dramas coincide with realities, a little too much in fact, that we're confused between these two from time to time. 

My kind of love isn't one that's filled with smiles, but one that despite all those tears, it's so strong that amongst it all, smiles emerge more genuinely and ever more lovingly. That one kind of love that has went through tremendous damages only to find the both of them back together again. And again. 

 Leisurely spent a short 10 minutes doing nothing but observing a flight of pigeons feeding on biscuit crumbs someone scattered over the ground. 

Like humans, their actions reflect their personalities too. Some pigeons paced around & spaced out, leaving the best to their mates. While some tried to lay their beaks onto as many crumbs as they could chance upon, a handful stopped feasting once they've had their fills. The competitive & ferocious ones constantly fought their own mates off to get what they want. The 'targets': some fought back & insisted on keeping what they've found while some backed away despite being stepped on. 

Walking back to my seat, wondering what kind of pigeon am I?

I don't think I'm afraid of death, I'm just afraid of 

Iosing the people I love,

I've always been a person who walks away too easily, not because I'm too weak to stay to mend broken hearts/things, quite on the contrary, it's because I'm too strong-headed. I'm too determined that I'm independant enough to shield myself away from sorrows and find happiness and strength within me alone. 

 

A strength and weakness, both at the same time. A weakness that I've to fight it off & isolate it. 

 

I believe in changes, because if that prevails, tomorrow will always be better. Changes must be positive in order for the consequences to be the same too. Between us, changes are constantly revolving. Sometimes, we deal with them just fine, but other times, disasters took place. But every disaster evolves into a beautiful beginning for us. For you, I'll fight for us just like how you've never stopped fighting. We may have flaws, but what are they if we're willing to change for the better for a better us?